Thursday, March 05, 2009

Dental Hygiene

Susie dreams.

She is attending her ex-boyfriend’s wedding, and he is getting married to her best friend. She is neither happy nor angry. She is hungry and is wondering whether it’s polite to eat even before wishing the bride and groom. Then she is wondering whether she has forgiven too easily, too early. Then she is wandering in this huge expanse of the wedding venue, lit up, crowded, with children running around as if it is a football field. She wants to catch the eye of the groom and give him one of her I-am-getting-bored-looks but he is busy shaking hands. She wants to catch the eye of the bride and give her one of her Why-was-I-even-invited looks but she is busy accepting cash-stuffed envelopes. Attention deficit, Susie decides it is a good time to throw a tantrum. She climbs up five steps to reach the stage and declares, “I am so bored. I am leaving.” Bride says, “No, we haven’t clicked photos with you yet.” Groom says, “No, you haven’t eaten anything yet.”

Susie says, “But I can’t eat, I haven’t yet brushed my teeth.”

Susie wakes up. It is ten o’clock on a Thursday morning. She has over slept. She must be starving in her sleep… yet she didn’t eat with an unclean mouth. She is so proud of herself. And so amazed at how a little bit of reality always creeps in the best of dreams and the worst of nightmares.

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Sunday, February 08, 2009

From a pair of lost ear rings

Amid an altercation of egos
And my growing suspicions
You shout, "Get Lost"
I play along, "I will"

--

Anyways
It is not that difficult to get lost these days
I know an art, opposite of personification
I can’t recall the word but I read somewhere
Objectification? Abstraction? Dehumanization?
I don’t know ... but I sure know this trick
In which I become a pair of gold ear rings
The same ones you buy for her birthday
The same ones that manage to get away
In the friction of your lust laden love
Marred by giggles and pushes and shoves
I conveniently slip out of her ears
And lie in a crease of the sheet
Witnessing both your bodies meet
And regretting all my marital years
Next day when you leave in haste
Because whatever said and done
A marriage needs its proper place
Even if it is to disguise disgrace
I am still hiding in that crease
As lost as you wanted me to be

--

I don't know yet how this will end
I may walk away, start a new trend
Or I may endure what I don't deserve
For it's not easy to un-learn love

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Tuesday, December 02, 2008

A Constant Reminder

This is a new start, isn’t it?
(Though for a purist, I wonder if new start = return back)

Still, new home in the same city... and loads and loads of cartons...
If you see me now, a six feet tall man standing in middle of a tiny penthouse on the thirteenth floor, you will not be able to see me, because the cartons tower over me...Possessing so much material stuff can be justified I guess, but for packing and moving!

The problem with break-ups is... the person moving out has to take with him every single thing he ever possessed... as if his stuff is shattered glass... every single tiny shard has to be accounted for and thrown out lest it pricks a tiny toe and causes pain...

Anyways...I don't care... I will unpack, read a book, sleep...I love being alone...I have decided past will not bother me...What if I find a kohl stained tissue in one of my coat pockets or a missing CD or half torn photographs or returned greeting cards (yeah...she will return bits of paper and letters and all... but kept all my mixed CDs...Women!)... no big deal!

I am tired of this already. Now, let me open the book carton and read something...
Whoa! On the top of the pile I see one of her books...good...good...let her miss something too...

I open the book. A bookmark falls out of it. She did this...after reading a book, she would hand make a bookmark and write a quotation from the book on it and keep it in the already read book...Duh! For what purpose!

I pick up the bookmark. On it, in her characteristic slanting writing is penned,

"The threshold of a new house is a very lonely place - Atwood"

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